Is Monogamy Natural for Human Beings?

Side Note: This is an old blog entry from a deleted website of mine. The original date of this post was: May 4th, 2010. 

A question that is frequently pondered by many, but never universally accepted. I think this one is best answered in the ‘comment field’ as opinions will definitely vary.

Bonobo Monkey

 This is not a promotion for adultery, ha! It’s about monogamy, whether it is natural or not. Sure, it seems to be the right thing to do, especially if you’re married with kids. But is it really in our nature to not stray, biologically?

 What is the tie that ties two together and keeps the knot knotted? Trust, respect, and morals could be the main reasons. To cut right down to the mental aspect of this, there is no telling how high the percentage is for sexually active male & female adults, (probably close to 99% or higher) when it comes to, from time to time, mentally lusting for other partners, sexually fantasizing about anyone besides your current lover on occasions, and so on.

 Look at the high divorce rates in the U.S., as the results are self-explanatory when it comes to couples not wanting to stay together for the duration. I’ve known several people who only keep their marriage together solely because of the kids, or due to financial reasons, security issues, etc.

Emotional thoughts often conflict the primal instinct with doubt, hesitation, reason, logic and conscience. Many people think love is illogical, and many think that being with one partner is actually cheating on yourself. On the flip side, there are a load of hopeless romantics and principal-bound fundamentalists out there. It sounds like a person’s head could split in half with all of these conflicting rational thoughts.

Morals are not the only reason that keeps certain peoples’ genitals master-locked by their spouse, since some customs and traditions around the world also practice these gonadal clamping beliefs of monogamy. On the other hand, depending on your system of beliefs, it may be perfectly normal to have multiple wives (polygamy) – it doesn’t work that way over here, though.

Like an animal out in the wild with all those potential mates, who is to really say there is only one for you? As nature often dictates, the male is generally a wanderer – out searching for fresh bounty and/or meandering around seeking female after female, sort of like a tomcat on the prowl. Hmm, I think I just defined the term "womanizer." There are some monogamous pairs of animals that aren’t actually sexually monogamous, as they often pair up to mate and stick together, yet they still take part in promiscuous activities – having sex with other partners outside of their prime mate.

Going back to the Stone Age, can you even imagine something like “faithfulness” being applied to their lifestyle? Yeah, I really doubt it. Have we slowly evolved into this conflicting subject, as we have strived for sophistication? Human beings, at times, are borderline domestic animals that can revert back to animalistic ways in a whim. So, with that being said, I see no reason why our sexual sensualities would be restricted if we were, say, back in the wild!

Take a bonobo, for example. Huh, what is a freakin’ bonobo? It’s part of the Hominidae family (great apes) – often called a Dwarf Chimpanzee and has very, very similar DNA to us, Homo sapiens. These highly, sexually active creatures often display non-monogamous activities, along with face-to-face sex, oral sex, kissing and even have same gender relations. But the point is, they do what they want. As odd as it may sound, I unfortunately read about how two male bonobos occasionally take part in something they call “penis fencing” – I found this tidbit when searching for more info about this particular type of critter. Yeah, I’m informed now, thanks Wiki. I guess their display of “fencing” shows even more what it means to be “free in nature.”

Anyway, back to the subject, I assume religion has a lot to do with installing guilt to the ones who like variety, as with marriage laws often preaching about faithfulness. And with many, it is also a mutual agreement between two people that love & care for each other. Personally, I think being faithful and loyal are great virtues to try and attain, but I can’t help but still wonder, “Is monogamy natural for human beings?” I think not…

Side Note: I originally posted this on an article-submit site (before it got moved to another blog, then another, etc.), so it immediately garnered a couple comments from some followers at the time. I'll go ahead and post those comments, below:

Comment #1:

William says:

May 4, 2010 at 9:28 am

HI – Take a look at indigenous cultures if you want to see what’s natural for humans. I think that we are meant to be monogamous and polygamous. That is, we form pair bonds (fall in love), but we also roam. It’s two different evolutionary drives that we are cursed with. One drive pushes us to spread our genes around with as many varied partners as possible, and the other pushes us to take care of our offspring so they will be successful and produce more offspring.

Plus, there are sexual differences – women need more security because they are more invested in the child rearing process. And then there are cultural differences, which evolve over time to suit the situation that societies find themselves in.

I think marriage (One person till we die) is a relatively new thing for the human race, and it is not natural. At its center is property rights and inheritance. The idea of romantic love was simply superimposed onto the mercenary model of marriage about a hundred years ago – and that may be one root of our current divorce rate. People are expecting something (true love) that marriage was never capable of providing.

Cool article, and something I think about a lot.

Comment#2:

Tonymac says:

May 4, 2010 at 9:49 am

Great article and thanks for the research that went into it. I simply endorse what William has said above – that monogamy and polygamy are the results of two separate evolutionary drives.

In South Africa, both polygamy and same-sex marriages are legal – and there is some evidence of people taking advantage of that, but relatively small numbers.

Love and peace,

Tony

Comment#3:

Thanks, William, for the excellent feedback! Yeah, us human beings seem to be cursed or afflicted with a lot of things in today’s world, ha!

Hey, Tony, thanks for the nice comment and for dropping by…

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Update [7-31-2013]: Dang, it is hard to believe that it has been 3 years since I originally posted this.  Anyway, I happened to think of this post a few moments ago, when I noticed an article online entitled “Monogamy may sound sweet, but why it evolved isn’t.”  You can find that recently published article, here:  https://news.yahoo.com/monogamy-may-sound-sweet-why-evolved-isnt-190422956.html [link is no longer active] 

Anyway, I think a lot of people are so glued to trying to twist and turn everything into the stupid evolution theory.  Sure, things evolve and adapt, but my gawd!  There are so many things I don’t agree with when concerning that theory.  Anyway, that’s another subject entirely.  I just thought I’d update this old blog post with a fresh link [That is no longer active as of 2024; ha!]. Cheers!

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Hashed & Browned Patties - How to make Hash Browns

Side Note: This is another old blog post from a previously deleted website of mine. The original date of this post is somewhere around the year of 2013. However, I'm sure this tasty breakfast item is still relevant today...

Have you ever wondered how those hashed, seasoned, tasty, browned patties are made?

It’s relatively simple and is well worth the effort.

Unless you're in a hurry or feeling a bit lazy, there is no need to drive up to a McDonald’s, early in the morning, for hash browns or to buy them frozen at a local market; just apply some do-it-yourself philosophy into your brain and get to cookin’…

What you’ll need: medium frying pan, grater, knife or potato peeler, 3 potatoes, oil, salt, pepper, sugar (optional).

Hashed Browns – Makes 4 – 6 patties, depending on the size of potatoes.

Rinse the potatoes; peel the skins off using a knife or peeler.

With a grater, grate the 3 potatoes into a plate or bowl.

By the time you get all of them grated, you may notice color changes due to the effects of air hitting the potatoes’ surface area. This is optional, but if you rinse the grated potatoes with water, then squeeze the excess moisture off, it should return back to normal (not that it really matters; it all cooks up in the end).

Now, shape them into patties – you may have to press them fairly hard; add salt & pepper.

Important step: take the pre-shaped patties, place them on a microwavable plate and microwave for 1 minute. This helps the fine strips, by briefly heating in a microwave, stick together within the patties – due to the sticky starch binding with heat, prior to frying. This also helps cut down on cooking time.

Take the medium skillet, add (enough to fry) the oil of your choice and pre-heat. I usually add additional salt & pepper to the oil, but it is optional.

Once the oil is hot, add the patties.

Fry over medium to medium-high heat.

Recommended for extra browning effects: Turn the hash browns over after one minute of frying, sprinkle a minuscule amount of sugar onto the patties. After another minute of cooking, turn them back over, sprinkle a small amount of sugar on the other side. This helps brown ’em quicker, plus, it adds a good, sweet taste. From here, cook to desired crispiness, doneness, etc.

Yep. It was as simple as that. This is great for breakfast or anytime you need a crunchy side dish of potato bliss. Enjoy...

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Shepherd's Pie - Quick & Simple Recipe

Side Note: This is an old blog entry from another domain of mine that I deleted a few years ago. The original date for this post was sometime in the year 2013. Anyway...

Below, I’ll provide a recipe for Shepherd’s Pie. This is the quick version, using instant potatoes and basic ingredients.

A lot of people add extra vegetables to it, but I just kept it simple and only included all the stuff that is more filling and/or promotes utter satiety. This dish should be referred to as a “casserole” as opposed to “pie” but hey, I didn’t name the damn thing……

This recipe makes 4 servings…

Cook 1 lb. of ground chuck or lean hamburger meat. I usually season the beef with a slight amount of Worcestershire sauce, seasoned salt, and black pepper.

As the beef is nearly done, add one tablespoon of dried, chopped onion into the frying pan – or you can substitute this with a small, fresh onion that is finely chopped.

After the beef is done, drain & set aside.

Prepare your instant potatoes, using a 6-serving sized proportion; salt & pepper to taste. Depending upon the time you want to put into this cuisine, using 3 large potatoes, you can substitute the instant potatoes by making your own homemade mashed potatoes the way you normally would prepare them. But, if you’re in a hurry, instant potatoes should suffice.

Okay, you now have your ground chuck/beef & potatoes done and seasoned…  In a 9 x 9 baking pan, use half of the ground beef for the first layer, then use half of the potatoes as the second layer, then add 4 slices of American cheese as the 3rd layer.

Repeat the same process for the 4th, 5th, and 6th layer – beef / potatoes / cheese.

Bake this dish at 350 degrees for about 10 minutes or until the top layer of the cheese starts to brown.

Cool & enjoy…

It should look something like this:

Excuse the incomplete pie, as my girlfriend spooned some out as I was going for the camera...

Quick Addition: Many people like to add corn along with other vegetables into their Shepherd’s Pie, so feel free to alter this simple recipe to better suit your taste. With or without the variations, it should turn out to be a tasty casserole. Yummy!

Image Credit: My own photo.

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